When you are young you learn about manners.

How to sit, stand, hold a napkin in your lap, and chew with your mouth shut.

There are other forms of manners, like how to be a father. And be a mother. This is useful because the child of these parents learns what it means to belong and what it means to be wanted by these people. This way when they go out into the scary and confusing adult world filled with distortion and lies they are equipped. They have a subconscious understanding of what the appropriate acceptance looks like.

Without this understanding the child becomes an adult who, frankly, doesn’t get it. They become easily bamboozled, and can likely marry the wrong person because they don’t know what real love looks like. This mistake creates a domino effect of trauma, and it takes even longer to sort the pieces and climb out of the dark well. In the meantime those who are better equipped are passing them by, figuring out what’s up from down much faster and making better decisions all around. The others are left behind (the lost ones), and become late bloomers, though most have given up on them by that point no matter how much good they have to offer the world.

The exception are those who are naturally inclined to be “street smart” no matter what their upbringing threw them. These people have early on figured out the weakness of humans as it pertains to ego and flattery. They know how to flaunt their stuff, and stroke, and peacock while the rest of humanity feels good in this charade and responds accordingly to their put-on behavior. These people end up winning, in all their fakery and lies, because they know how to play the system. It is a current form of how to behave, you can call it manners so to speak, an appropriate etiquette.

In the meantime those who are real are met with confusion and disconnect because very few are speaking the same language.

Etiquette is a conformity, a way of saying “I see how I am supposed to behave” like a containment. It helps keep the status quo.

If you examine feminine energy at its core, it has nothing to do with this BS. This is where I struggle as a woman because I have the keys to the kingdom. I am not under the spell of this etiquette. I have the bravery and authenticity that goes beyond. Yet I am alone in this, dealing mostly with people looking for the predictable.

It is an incredibly painful and lonely journey.